hridayéshvari mangalam hridilasa téjómayi mangalam
mridu bhasini mangalam
vijayatám prémá krité mangalam
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goddess of the heart mother who speaks softly
embodiment of love
may there be auspiciousness
Mata AmritanandamayiThis year's retreat in San Ramon was the most amazing by far. For starters, I was allowed accommodations on site. I drove up to the ashram already very excited by this, but when I arrived and registered, I found out I was staying in the same building as Amma.
That night after I had received darshan, I went back to the ashram house to get some sleep early. (I had to be up the following morning at 6am for breakfast seva duty.) I had trouble getting to sleep and then suddenly I woke up because I heard someone talking loudly. As a child will instinctively get out of bed to see what's the matter, I got up and walked over to the curtain.
I was still mostly asleep when I realized that something was wrong -- the voice I was hearing was not in English. I looked into the main entrance room, and seeing all the swamis and brahmacharin lined up along both sides of the staircase, I dropped to my knees. There, at the base of the stairs, was Amma talking animatedly. When she saw me, she laughed and marched up the stairs. She held me into her waist, stroking my head, and continued to address everyone.
After many minutes had passed, the other people who were sharing the room came out to see what the commotion was about. (It was louder now that it was coming from directly outside our door.) Amma lovingly touched all the other womens' heads with her one hand while continuing to hold me. Then, with a laugh and a shooing motion of her hands, she sent us back to our sleeping bags with, "sleep. sleep."
There were many beautiful things that happened during the next few days -- a beautiful meditation by the swan pond, meeting a gorgeous and playful Eclectis parrot named Ralph, singing with my satsang group on stage, meeting incredible people, receiving a name, and finding myself directly in front of Swamiji while he translated the Devi Puja prayer -- but nothing will ever compare to the few precious moments, between waking and sleep, that Amma held me as her child. Now I understand what it means to belong.
"Our surroundings greatly affect us. A parrot raised in a church or temple will say God's name, but a parrot raised in a bar will always use vulgar language." - Ammachi
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"Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary." - Mother Theresa